Stew Miller Musings and Rants
I Complain (Oh, and Doodle), You Read and/or Comment, Everyone is Happy… IT’S SO SIMPLE!


So the boys decided for us, as a family, what it was we were going to do today. And hey, that was cool with me, I was a little worn out on decision making and Amy was fairly indifferent since her Aunt Flo had arrived (that woman is a colossal bitch, by the way… not Amy, her aunt… wait, no maybe I meant what I typed the first time…), but I digress, outside of parenthetical citations even… goodness but I’m a rebel. So we went downtown to this really neat play area located right near our homey little Farmer’s Market.

It turns out that our kids are partial to this particular activity structure because it is designed for use by children with special needs and has, presumably because of the former statement, a really sweet slide made out of individual rollers instead of one solid slab of normal slide material like plastic or rusty, filthy metal. I guess there are more accoutrements for the differently-abled set in our town, but I wasn’t certain which parts they were… wonderful design that. Oh, by the way, before I get too far here, I forgot to mention the SWARM OF POLICE!

So there was this incredibly huge collection of police officers located at every intersection, back road, main drag, and throughway all about the entirety of Kalamazoo. This seemed a bit odd to us as we were tooling along. It honestly looked like a manhunt like you’d see on CSI or something where every lawman in sight is gathered to track down some escaped pedophile clown or something. They even had the Police Chopper airborne and circling the grounds like it was targeting Jason Bourne or some such nonsense! As we pulled into the park I stopped and asked one of the uniformed gents what the hubbub was and he said, in his best, ‘Police business, move along’ attitude, “Rally.” Rally? Like a gathering of folks promoting a belief in one form or another? A rally this massive calling forth a battalion of Kalamazoo’s finest must be pretty damn spectacular, but the cop was either unwilling to share or else just being… well, a cop.

Arriving at the park we notice yet another shielded fellow further down the way at the bridge that leads one into town and we saw folks meandering up the path carrying signs. This looked promising, maybe these kind people wouldn’t mind sharing their experience with the RALLY OF ’07. I inquired as to how the demonstration went hoping to gracefully tug out some info, but, as it turned out, their cryptic greeting was useless proclaiming, “No violence and lovely under the eyes of the Lord, blessed be, amen, pass the yams…”, or maybe something similar, they were pretty useless so I tuned them out. Soon after another group of people passed through and Amy found out that this Rally, this road-closing march of monumental importance was… for the Goddamn KKK!

Look, I can get behind pretty much anything that has a message or some kind of solid backbone. Shit, I can stand back and listen as Homosexuals mince merrily along proclaiming themselves fully normal under the law begging for all benefits therein, I can abide the marching masses denouncing abortion and all the horrible actions that fall within its disturbing occurrences, and I can understand parades of folks proclaiming their particular chunk of Christianity is stronger and more acceptable than another’s; all of these things have a value and an actual message. The fucking Klan? They form rallies because they hate people. What kind of bullshit is that! There are several people I’ve met in my life that I would just as soon run down with a bus but I’ll be damned if I’m going to throw on a sheet and trudge around telling everyone about it! Everyone knows what the Klan is and everyone knows their shady past what with the lynchings and public hangings and all… back in the 1800’s! Man, the times have changed so much I am honestly stunned that these assholes have any solid ground to stand on at all. I know, crap, we all know, that prejudice isn’t going to go away… it just isn’t. And yes, I understand freedom of assembly and speech are protected under the Constitution, and I guess if you want to chuck on some bedding and a dunce cap and proudly remind the world what a damn dick you are, knock yourself out, but really, do it out in the middle of nowhere where no one can see you… your mommies must have told you to grow up once, didn’t they?

Fortunately my kids had no clue what was going on and, luckily, no violence or unnecessary happenings came to be and, as a little icing on the cake, the children got to meet a few of the great cops we have here in town and were given Shield Stickers like little honorary officers. Now boys, go bust those damn ignorant folks who look like walking vanilla cones! SHOOT TO KILL! Amen.



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